Monday, June 1, 2009

Senses..blabbering again

So.... I took a much needed vacation. Had some much needed fun. And now I'm back to reality.

I guess my time was so memorable because I haven't had a chance to just be me in such a long time. Being me...I always say that I am a different person now that I'm a mom. The person I was before still sits inside me...lurking. The Dominican Republic was all I needed. LOL... I did things I have never done before and experienced feelings that I thought I forgot. Just uninhibited fun.

As soon as I got on the plane to come home...I became vacation sick. I said that I needed just one more week. Another day even. I came home and dropped my bags. They sat there up until a few minutes ago...

Opening the bags let out a familiar fragrance...happiness. The smell of the sand, salt water, and tropical island brought me back to that place. Immediately I began to have flashbacks of my time there...and I began to miss it all over again. Its amazing how connected the senses are...what they can do to you. Just eating a certain kind of fruit can bring back the memory something know? I took my heavy bag, sat it on my lap and looked at the outfits I wore. I wrapped myself in them and took in their scent, trying to capture the moment when I wore it. What I did and who I was with. Gave me the shivers. I remembered the impenetrable smile that would never leave my face. I saw the salty swimsuits in my bag and could almost feel the sand in between my toes. I put one on...and am still wearing it. This is an escape...I wonder when I'll have the courage to take it off.

Getting up without an alarm clock, feeling sexy and free. Letting my thoughts wander as I lay on the beach without a single care in the world. Meeting people from all around the world who just wanted to let their hair down.

When I visited the discoteque, I saw women and men dancing...eyes closed. Thoughts ablaze. Just basking in the sensual moment they were in right then. I joined them... feeling my limbs twist and if one with the music. My partner felt my energy and his thoughts became mine. His hands knowingly explored my skin and took in the fragrance on my neck. Been so long..... There was no need to allow or prohibit. No words to be spoken. His energy picked up everything it should have. Our bodies swayed to the waves that crashed outside and sweat dripped to the beat of the music. I wondered was it the place that was so enchanting? If so, I might invest in timeshare...LOL.

No one understood what this trip meant to me. I plan on making this something regular....